things to never make fun of:
- mental illnesses
- eating disorders
- cutting
- suicide
- rape
when people say “present” instead of here during attendance
*whispers in ur ear* would you like fries with that
*bites lip* oh yeah baby
*touches ur inner thigh* would you like to super size that
*pokes head through the door* we’re out of toilet paper
what
*pokes head through window* she said she’s out of toilet paper
wtf can we get some privacy here
*pokes head through the ceiling vent* no
That escalated quickly…
I went to church with my family tonight and the pastor said something that I think every Christian should hear
- Pastor: Now, according to a few passages in the bible, homosexuality is a sin.
- Couple of older males in the audience: Amen!
- Pastor: Now, wait, I'm not finished.
- Pastor: You know what else the bible defines as a sin? Divorce.
- -uncomfortable silence-
- Pastor: There are countless passages that talk about how divorce is wrong, and that there are consequences to getting a divorce, such as the wife should be stoned.
- Pastor: Yet, I witnessed a divorce just this morning. And I gotta tell you, it was heartbreaking, but I definitely didn't attempt to throw rocks at the wife, even though she was the one who filed for divorce.
- Pastor: We choose to overlook the consequences of divorce because time has proven that they're inhumane and cruel.
- Pastor: The bible doesn't say anything about the consequences of a homosexual lifestyle. Yet, we seem to be spearheading a campaign to ruin the lives of people we don't even know.
- -the pastor shifts a few notes around-
- Pastor: The bible states to love thy neighbor. That's it. There are no other rules or restrictions to that passage.
- Pastor: So, we as a church family have to support equality with a smile on our face. THAT is the true Christian way.
cute …. loves attention …. always hungry …. sleeps a lot …. i show all the symptoms of being a dog
That’s why you’re called a bitch
yo u better watch ur shit
what if i just started licking the dentists fingers while they were in my mouth omg






